The focus of my career as a relationship coach and Tantric Educator has been to help people return to their natural state of Bliss. This can be done in a variety of ways, through meditation, energy work, and even hands on Tantric work. But all of these modalities will be undermined if a person or couple’s mindset is working against them. In order for you to find your way back into bliss, it is essential to have a positive mindset, one that is free from anxiety and excessive negativity.
For many people, excessive worrying is a thought process that can quickly get in the way of finding the good in life. At its worst, anxiety about the future can even be debilitating. Despite the fact that worrying tends to put us on a negative course to illness and even complacency, many of us continue to worry about even the tiniest concerns, eventually creating a self-fulfilling prophecy of doom and disaster.
If you or someone you love suffers from this destructive habit, consider these tips to assist you in letting go of some of your worry.
In a sense, worrying is just a natural extension of risk-reduction. In our minds, we may believe that heading off disasters at the pass by anticipating them before they can occur will make us feel safe and secure in the long-term. Ironically, we can damage our health and even ruin promising outcomes simply by over-calculating the risk involved in making everyday choices. Rather than focusing on how risky a certain course of action is, try listing all the ways it will benefit you to stretch.
Challenging Negative Thoughts
Since reducing anxiety most effectively comes through a conscious reframing of our mindset, it’s important to challenge the negative thoughts we find ourselves thinking. For example, if you tend to avoid making decisions to avoid catastrophes in the future, perhaps try spending some serious time weighing the facts of the situation against the messages that our emotions send us when we’re feeling anxious. Be more objective about the situation. Borrow the perception of someone who is more neutral to determine if you are seeing the situation clearly.
When Reality Isn’t That Bad
More often than not, we’ll discover that a situation that occurs in reality will be far less stressful than what we make it out to be in our minds. In fact, we may even find that the rewards accompanying any risk-taking venture are life-changing for the better. For this reason it’s helpful to step in when you see yourself creating a doomsday scenario.
Dealing with Risk, Enjoying the Rewards
If we continue to avoid making decisions out of a fear that we’ll fail, however, we’ll never get to enjoy the good things that can come from taking a chance and finding a new path in life. Too often, people with anxious thoughts avoid taking such chances at all costs; in the end, all they’re left with are regrets about what could have been. Try starting small with easy risks, like ordering something new at a restaurant, wearing a color that feels out of your comfort zone, or going to a park you have never visited before. Remind yourself you don’t want to miss out on life due to worrying about things that haven’t happened.
The Power of Critical Reasoning
Indeed, it is through this kind of critical thinking that we can best approach a negative mindset. Often, we’ll find that the situations we worry about just aren’t that bad in reality. If we’re upset at the behavior of other people, moreover, we can reframe that frustration by telling ourselves that what people arguably should do is very different from what people actually do. Their choices are up to them, so why should we spend time worrying about those choices?
When we admit that there are things in life that we simply have no control over, we’ll rest easier knowing that we’ll approach what we can control with seriousness and competence. Truly, that is changing our mindset (and our lives) for the better.
When it comes to changing how you feel, let go of the story and move the energy. Once you have rid yourself of anxiety and gained a more peaceful state, the reasons, justifications, blame and defense mechanisms become irrelevant and bliss is restored.